In a couple of weeks the thrift store I work at shuts down. It’s done. Finito. Over. I don’t get my paycheck from the store since this is kind of like a “praktikplats”. I guess the closest translation for that would be internship but it’s less pretentious than that. I’m gonna try to find a new internship now but I’m sad to leave my current job. I’ve pretty much been able to do what I want with the store and I don’t think I’ll get that kind of responsibility somewhere else.

Obviously this has made me think a lot about my future and sometimes I feel like I’ve blown it. I could have got so much better grades in high school but I didn’t study hard enough and now I can’t get into any school. It’s not like I want to be a doctor but whatever I want to do there will be people with better grades than mine. It’s just such a shame because I’m so much smarter than what those grades tell you. I just didn’t care enough about school to do my best.

I’d probably still get into a lot of schools because my grades aren’t terrible. Just average. Unfortunately nothing but the best have ever been good enough for me. It’s probably not a good characteristic of mine but I’m very competative and I really, really hate people doing better than me.

I’m thinking about perhaps going back to school. Probably some kind of distance education but it’s too late to apply to the courses starting this fall. Perhaps next year I could try to get into some distance education course in web design. It’s been a hobby of mine for ten years now and of all the things I can imagine working with web design is what I’d prefer.

Of course what I really want to do is travel the world for a year or so. Unfortunately that’s impossible since what I could save up to in a year would be no more than perhaps a month of really low budget traveling. And that’s a huge perhaps seeing I’m terrible with money. Relisticly three days at the medieval week in Visby is what I get.

I don’t think money is the most important things in life but right now I really wish I was rich. Even though money per se wouldn’t make me happy at least it would give me the opportunty to pursue things that could make me happy.

My future is very unclear right now. I have no idea where I’m going. I feel like I’m jumping a springboard into the unknown.

Dagens ord (äntligen!): Gåslever!